17 Things Nobody Tells You About Owning A Cat

1. Nobody tells you about the secret, second life your cat will lead when you’re not around.

1. Nobody tells you about the secret, second life your cat will lead when you’re not around.
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2. Nobody tells you how easily startled they are.

2. Nobody tells you how easily startled they are.

3. Nobody tells you how much joy it gives them to knock your shit onto the floor.

3. Nobody tells you how much joy it gives them to knock your shit onto the floor.

4. Nobody tells you that once you get a cat, you’ll probably never be able to own a plant again because they’ll find a way to completely destroy it.

4. Nobody tells you that once you get a cat, you’ll probably never be able to own a plant again because they’ll find a way to completely destroy it.

5. Nobody tells you that the second a bug enters your home, your cat will find it. Immediately. And possibly eat it.

5. Nobody tells you that the second a bug enters your home, your cat will find it. Immediately. And possibly eat it.

6. Nobody tells you how wild they get at the most unexpected times.

6. Nobody tells you how wild they get at the most unexpected times.

7. Nobody tells you that when their poo is covered in litter, it looks like Nerds Rope.

7. Nobody tells you that when their poo is covered in litter, it looks like Nerds Rope.

8. Nobody tells you how much they enjoy lying across keyboards and notebooks, especially when you’re using them.

8. Nobody tells you how much they enjoy lying across keyboards and notebooks, especially when you’re using them.

9. Nobody tells you how cuddly they actually are, despite their antisocial reputations.

9. Nobody tells you how cuddly they actually are, despite their antisocial reputations.

10. Nobody tells you how delightfully weird they are — this is one I can’t explain. You’ll know it when you see it.

10. Nobody tells you how delightfully weird they are — this is one I can’t explain. You’ll know it when you see it.

11. Nobody tells you how good they are at hiding, and how many times you’ll crap your pants frantically trying to find them.

11. Nobody tells you how good they are at hiding, and how many times you’ll crap your pants frantically trying to find them.

12. Nobody tells you about the funny way they rotate their ears and point them backwards like fuzzy little satellite dishes.

12. Nobody tells you about the funny way they rotate their ears and point them backwards like fuzzy little satellite dishes.

13. Sure, maybe someone told you cats love boxes, but you can’t even begin to fathom just how much until you witness it yourself.

13. Sure, maybe someone told you cats love boxes, but you can’t even begin to fathom just how much until you witness it yourself.

14. Nobody tells you how many worst-case scenarios you’re capable of thinking up that involve your cat escaping or getting injured when you’re not home.

14. Nobody tells you how many worst-case scenarios you’re capable of thinking up that involve your cat escaping or getting injured when you’re not home.

And that anxiety won’t be entirely unfounded.

15. Nobody tells you how fiercely they’ll pursue your dinner — that’s not just a dog thing.

15. Nobody tells you how fiercely they’ll pursue your dinner — that’s not just a dog thing.

16. Nobody tells you just how potent catnip actually is.

16. Nobody tells you just how potent catnip actually is.

17. And finally, nobody tells you how gratifying it is to earn your cat’s trust. It feels better than graduating from college.

17. And finally, nobody tells you how gratifying it is to earn your cat’s trust. It feels better than graduating from college.

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